Faking it
by Elitess
Summary: What if your best friend, who by the way is, no offense, a fucking manwhore but still the the one you just can't stop thinking about, asks you to pretend to be in a relationship with him - that's right: You fake it! Or do you? AH
1. Prolog

hey guys,

i was just doin a little writing and well... this is it. I found it quite funny so i thought why not share it. Maybe you'll like it too. Maybe you won't... let's see how it goes.

Oh, and just so you ppl know, i'm sorry for any kind of grammar or spelling mistakes but well, i'm a) betaless (is that a word?!) and b) not a native english speaker soo... well, suck it up ;)

And just to sum it up: This story is just a fun little something. Nothing angsty or well... in any way disturbing. Just... stuff.

So... well... (don't you just love these kinds of unnecassary in-between-words) enjoy :D

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**Prolog:**

Seriously, I'm definitely going crazy over here. It's somehow started like a century ago, at least it feels like it and has now eventually managed to destroy my entire life. How the hell did THIS happen and more importantly why did it have to happen to me? Oh, before you start making any kind of stupid assumptions, no, I'm not pregnant. To be frank I'm further away from getting an opportunity to even get knocked up than ever before.

Only a few months ago my life had been like a fairytale. Well, a pretty modern – and boring – one I'd have to admit, but still, I was actually content with my... well, being. Wouldn't call it a life yet, but some sort of an existence. It was my senior year in high school, I was neither popular nor a loner, rather some sort of an average student. Only with better grades. And more brain cells.

But okay, I have to admit, I never really rocked the whole boyfriend thing, though I might have to add that I never really tried either. Not that I didn't want one, it was just for the lack of a considerable contestants, that I didn't really get settled in that sort of life experience.

On the other hand my friends were actually hitting it off quite well. There's Alice, my best pixie psycho stylist/therapist friend – she said that herself one day, I seriously laughed my head off! - and her boyfriend Jasper the... well, the Jasper.

There isn't a whole lot to say about him I guess. He's nice in a cool way and always speaks in some sort of a mumbled voice. Sometimes it's like he's trying to send messages via Morse code, but Alice understands him nevertheless. It's like they've been created for each other, really. Well yes, standing next to each other he looks like he's gonna put her in his bag and carry her back home to eat, but one gets used to her being a dwarf and him a giant. At least their children have a realistic chance of becoming a normal height. That's a plus.

Then there's Rosalie the most beautiful bitch on planet earth and her big... no HUGE boyfriends Emmett. Who I might add is also my cousin. Motherly. Don't ask. There's no real resemblance between me and him as he's well... massive and I'm... not. As I've said, average. He and Rosalie have been together forever and therefore she's become kind of a sister to me. At the same time she's living right next door, which made it quite inevitable for us to become friends.

Last but not least there's Cullen. Oh damn, excuse me – Edward. Don't tell him I forgot again... but... well anyway, let's continue... where was I?... Oh, right, Edward. For some "Weird" reason he's always making me forget what I've been talking about... haha, yes, it's this obvious.

As embarrassing as it is... I'm pretty much in love with him.

But really, before you judge me and give me this whole crap about friends being friends blah blah I might have to say... YOU'D BE THE SAME IF YOU KNEW HIM! There you have it! Cause frankly, I don't think there's ever been a more... I really don't want to say awesome, as there's so many well... stupid bitches who just luuuuurve saying this word in context to well... everything they consider awesome (like a blow dryer or fake fingernails – you get my point), but in this case I think there really is no way of avoiding it cause he seriously is just awesome.

We've known each other for ages and been best friend just as long. Now, twelve years later, he's the king of our school – the captain of the football team, the head of the student council and the only imaginable candidate of giving the speech at our graduation. He's good with the lady's, too... although, erm, no, that doesn't really cover it... more like he's slept with about half of our student body (just so you know, half of our student body is female) and still every girl is trying to get into HIS pants... well you see – awesome.

I really don't appreciate the attention he gets from girls, but really, there isn't anything I can do about it. If he's okay with screwing all the girls in the USA – at least the pretty and skinny ones – than well, I've got to come to terms with that.

I remember the time when he told me about his first girlfriend – Lauren. He'd told my while we were out eating Chinese at our favorite restaurant in Port Angeles. We were both just starting high school and had been talking about the new people we'd met, when he suddenly said all too casually:

"By the way, Bells. I'm going out with Lauren now."

I felt like a big ass stone had hit me right on the head. Or a car. Or a freaking dinosaur.

I've got to say I don't really remember my reaction – must have suppressed this traumatic memory for good. I only recall something like me rambling about how happy I was for him and Lauren and how I'd always known, whereas I was thinking how I had been caught up in my fantasy world before where Edward would always stay asexual and how the hell I could make this dinosaur stop keeping me from breezing and rather eat Lauren up.

Two month later he told me that he lost his virginity to Lauren. For over two weeks I kept crying myself to sleep when I was sure my father was already asleep and nobody would notice. It was a tough time. Not like emo, seeing no sense in life anymore tough but... well, just tough. Like teenager tough. That includes a wrong haircut and gaining two pounds. But still to be taken VERY seriously.

Now, three years later I'd gotten kind of used to Edward fucking everybody – in the literally fucking everybody sense. What kind of relieved me was only the fact that every time he was fed up with one of his new playmates and ditched them without an explanation he always kept coming back to me. Only in a non physical way. Bummer.

But now... well, I messed up I'd say. Like big time. Like seeing no sense in life anymore messed up. Not like I'm really considering killing myself, never. Honestly, I worked way to hard to achieve my good grades for me to waste them now. But still... I don't know how to fix it. And I only know that life is never gonna be the same again. Like ever.

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haha, dramatic teenagers just crack me up. But hang on, that was just the prolog so... why don't you check out the first chapter and maybe tell me whether you liked it or not...

have an awesome (^^) day

your Elitess (which by the way is a brand for bottled water, which I was drinking as i created this accound. All the names i could think of where already occupied so i thought: What the heck, and used my drink for inspiration. Just a shame that it was just water and not a cocktail called: "Dirty hoe" or the non-alcoholic version of sex on the beach: "holding hands on the beach" - but well, can't fight destiny^^)


	2. Chapter 1

So here it is, chapter 1. Have at it ;)

Hope you like it aaaaand... if you do... why don't you leave me a comment?! :D

Enjoy!

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Three months ago:

Okay, here we go: It's Monday which I think is bad news already but it gets even worse – Edwards car broke down on Saturday and is only gonna be fixed till Thursday. Therefore it's me and him sitting in the back of Rosalies red Mercedes listening to Avril Lavigne's new songs, trying not to jump out of the car in frustration. Oh yes, and we're heading to school and we're late.

"Great start into a great week" ,I mumbled to myself, but Edward heard and nodded in agreement. I knew why he wasn't all too keen on going to school, also. Yesterday he'd told me he'd dump his current 'girlfriend' Amy today as she'd been "too clingy" in the last couple of days. Though I didn't really feel sympathetic towards her – Amy is as dumb as toast and nobody pities bread – I was surprised that the 'relationship' between her and Cullen had lasted as long as it had (which means exactly one weekend) and kind of wondered how she was gonna cope with the break up. Probably sniffing a few times, shedding a few tears then finally telling him to go screw himself. Which would probably lead to him screwing her. The usual break up sex. Well, usual for Edward, that is.

Smiling I turned to Cullen when we got out of the car and walked over the parking lot towards the school building.

"Well, at least one of us is gonna enjoy a round of hot break up sex in the janitors closet during lunch. You want me to save you a sandwich or do you think it's gonna be a longer session this time?" Well yes I smiled, but inside I felt like hitting something. Preferably Amy.

But Edward only laughed and put his arm over my shoulder.

I might have to add that I don't like him touching me. Like never. Well, not that I don't like it in the sort of not liking it at all kind of way...I just don't like being nervous whenever his hand brushed against mine in the slightest way. So ever since I noticed my crush I'd kept my distance, but now that he was in physical contact with women the whole time he often seemed to forget I didn't like being tempted in that sort of way. Especially if we were just talking about his sexual plans for the day.

Trying not to be all too obviously excited about his touch I shrugged his arm off.

"Sorry" ,I added. I always apologized whenever we touched. Weird habit, I'd say.

But Cullen didn't like it at all.

"Damn it, Bella. You didn't hurt my feelings, I just forgot. Quit apologizing the whole day long. It's more annoying than anything you might ever actually do."

I bit my tongue in order to not let the sorry slip that was already waiting to get out. I'm hopeless. Hopelessly anxious. Hopelessly in love... have your pick.

We went off to our lessons after agreeing on meeting up after first period. That meant German for me. Don't ask. I'm somehow into all this sharp "s", "ä,ü,ö" and "ch" stuff.

But for some reason this time first period seemed to last forever. When the bell finally rang I nearly jolted out of my seat and practically ran into the library, where me and Cullen where supposed to meet for our free period together.

But he didn't show.

After twenty minutes I'd given up on walking around like a locked up tiger, but reached for my book – Shades of grey by Jasper Fforde, which is NOT 50 shades of grey... just so we're clear! – when suddenly somebody tapped on my shoulder. Smiling I turned around only to find Tyler standing behind me, grinning like the jock he is.

"Hey Swan, looking good today"

I frowned. Either he really had some sort of a problem with his eyes or he had amnesia, as I'd worn the exact same outfit just last week – a fact that would get me into trouble with Alice later on, but anyway. Apparently he seemed to find my T-Shirt and Jeans combination more than worth noticing NOW, counting from the number of times he looked me up and down.

Annoyed already I tried to turn away, but he didn't want to end our conversation just yet.

"Oh come on, Bella." ,he said and grabbed my arm, "I'm only doing some small talk here. Don't make this so hard on me. I really like you and -"

" - you might wanna step away about at least a few feed or I'm gonna have to make it a little harder on you!" , a voice said right behind me.

I didn't have to look in order to know who was acting like a freaking knight in shining armor again. Sighing I stepped back, leaving both of the boys looking at me in astonishment.

"Really Tyler" ,I started, "one might think your a nice guy but honestly I don't actually like you in any way so just leave and go look for somebody who's dumb enough to fall for you"

With that I turned around, grabbed my bag and headed out of the library. As expected it took Edward only a few seconds to catch up with me.

"Wow, that was really great, Bells. You should have seen his stupid face when you -"

"You've got to stop this, Cullen" , I interrupted.

We stopped in track and looked at each other, me pissed off and him confused.

"But", he stuttered, "I... I... thought... why wouldn't you want me to help you out when these jerks treat you like you're for sale or something?"

Now I was really furious: "You don't get it, do you. It's because your the same, Cullen. You treat girls like crap all the time and guess what, they seem to be okay with it and if one of them might not be maybe they'll tell you off themselves, but not sent a guard in order to do it. I'm not that incapable."

"I know you're not" , he said, "but because I know how these guys work I really don't want you to fall for one of their tricks. You deserve being treated like the great person you are and not like some slut you screw and dumb in one night!"

"But what if I want to get screwed, he? Ever thought of that? I'm not a child anymore, Edward. I'm just as old as you are and I have needs too... oh... no, scratch that, that sounds just... nasty. But you know what I mean. Maybe I want to finally start... things."

For a second we only kept starring at each other. I hadn't even noticed that we'd somehow moved the argument into a quiet corner behind the emergency exit door. At least our conversation and therefore the proclamation of my needs wouldn't be school gossip later on.

Finally it was Edward who started talking again.

"You wouldn't want this kind of everything. Tyler doesn't want to go out with you because he likes you for who you are, but because he knows you are my best friend and additionally a... well... a virgin." I saw him swallow. Wow, the Edward Cullen really was capable of becoming embarrassed at last. Impressive. Like watching fish fly or birds talk... wait a second... you know what, screw it, you get the point. On with the show:

I waited, but Edward didn't continue.

So I said something I would regret later on. "So what, I'm a virgin. But guess what, I don't want to stay a virgin my whole life long. Maybe you don't get it, because you have your dose of sex provided whenever you enter school, but I certainly don't. Don't you think I freaking want a boyfriend, too?"

I felt like I had made myself pretty clear, but obviously I was wrong.

"But he's not asking to be your boyfriend but to be the guy who pops your cherry. Damn it, why are you so stubborn?" Now Edward was pissed as well. Great. Why the hell did I even bother talking to him. He wouldn't even last a month without screwing and afterwords ditching at least two girls. Oh... I got a point there... so I said:

"You're one to talk. You're a living girl-devourer. Why the hell is it okay for you to pick up girls and break their hearts but not for Tyler?"

"Because it's not about you, but me!" ,he shouted. Damn it, he was furious now. I tried to back away a few feet without him noticing, while he continued.

"He is into Amy. He wanted to have her and I knew but... well, I kind of went for it anyway and now he's trying to get even by fucking with you." He finished and looked at me for understanding, but as soon as he realized what he'd just said his face expression fell. I can only imagine how pissed off I must have looked.

"Oh God Bella, that's not what I mean. Your the single most awesome person I know on this planet. But you also know how this kind of stuff works..."

To my own surprise I felt tears streaming to my eyes. Tears of anger and, yes a little of disappointment, too. But mostly anger.

Well isn't it nice, crying before noon. What a great day it is already.

"So you say that Tyler is only well... pissing on your territory, so to speak. He's not into me or something, but actually wants to annoy you by screwing his best geek grey-mouse of a friend, who coincidentally is a virgin. Charming..."

I really didn't want him to see me cry. Last time I'd done that was in seventh grade after receiving the message of my parents divorce and ended in me cheering him up as he freaked out about what to do with me crying... weird story and absolutely nothing I'd have liked to relive. So I made an attempt to turn around, but Cullen stopped me by grabbing my arm.

"Bells, please. Please don't think that only because this asshole is trying to use you to get to me that he wouldn't actually like you or that you're not likable anyway or... well just... damn it!" His hand tore on his hair, just like he always did when he was nervous (what didn't happen very often I might add).

Finally he started talking again. "You don't like him. I know that. Why does it bother you that he's not actually into you?"

I couldn't look him in the eye as I answered. Damn, at least what I was gonna say would sound just as pathetic and stupid as I felt.

"I just want to be wanted, Edward"

He looked at me confused. "What do you mean? You are wanted. There's a hell lot of people who love you to bits, Bells. I don't get your point..."

"Well of course you don't. You're not the one sitting at home alone on a Saturday night watching chick flicks on her laptop. I want to be liked as a well... a girl. I just..." I had to swallow before I could make me say the actual words... "I want to be loved."

I could sense Cullen getting uncomfortable, therefore I once again tried to free myself but failed. You know, the whole crap about emancipation and stuff is kind of forgetting the very important fact about men simply being the physically stronger gender and can therefore make a girl do basically anything as long as it's connected to physical strength. But really, I'm still so proud to be a woman...

But I'm getting off point:

"You are loved. I love you, Bella. Alice loves you, and Jasper. Emmett and Rosalie. Or Angela. We all love you. And of course your dad. There's a lot of people who'd be devastated to hear you say something like that." , Cullen said, looking at me like I was the one who didn't get the freaking point. Heaven give me strength, I thought, it's way to early for this!

"You don't get it, Cullen. Not like a friend. You might love me, but you love me like a friend. I want to be loved like... like a girl. Like a boy loves a girl. In a... physical way. I want the whole package. But apparently nobody wants to share mine... "

"Oh damn it Bells... " Now he really was uncomfortable. Would be a real miracle if there was any hair left on his head after this conversation.

"This is about sex?" He sounded completely shocked. What a freaking hypocrite.

"Oh don't you act all shocked on me now, Edward Cullen. You're Forks number one manwhore. Don't you tell me that sex is about love and all that sappy crap."

"But it should be. At least for you!" Here we go again.

I made a face. "Care to elaborate: How am I any different from you?"

"Because you deserve a guy carrying you on his hands, that's why. Bella... you might not see it, but... you're my best friend. I just don't want you to get hurt."

" But I do, Cullen" ,I said while looking him straight in the eye. "I hurt. I get hurt everyday. It's hard to see you guys all happy and not feel... left out. I feel like I am missing out on the most epic thing in life and only because of who I am."  
"Bella, believe me, that's not the point. Every guy would be thrilled to have you as a girlfriend."

"Oh really. Than please explain this to me: Where the hell are all these guys? Because I can't see 'em anywhere around. "

"You've got to be patient..."

"Patient my ass" I shouted, stamping my foot like a pampered nine year old. "I can't believe it's you who's telling me all this. You wouldn't even make it one month as a boyfriend, because you couldn't love this girl the way she'd want her boyfriend to love her and eventually dumb her anyway. Why do you think other guys would be any different..."

"You seriously don't think I'd make it one month as a boyfriend?" He looked genuinely hurt. But I couldn't back down now.

"Make it a week, I'd still have my doubts. It's not about you personally, Cullen, you know you are my best friend and I well... I like you a lot, but you must know yourself at least this much. You're not exactly boyfriend material."

"What is that supposed to mean?" His voice rose a few notches. I just rolled my eyes.

"You've watched enough girly movies with me to know what I mean. Don't act all dumb now."

He fell silent for a while, starring at his shoes, before he finally looked up at me.

"That is what you think?" I raised an eyebrow quizzically.

"Well... yes, didn't I just say that?!"

"You... REALLY think that?" He kept looking at me like... there's not even a word for it. Just weird.

So I frowned. "Yes. And apparently you are deft now, too."

Finally Cullen ditched his interrogation look and changed it into this crooked smile I love so much – er, I mean WE ALL love so much... damn it, I'm so whipped.

So before there was any chance for me to say something stupid out loud as well I smiled back and exhaled in fake relieve.

"Well.. now that that's settled... I guess I have to go to English." Bullshit, but I didn't care. I mimed looking at an imaginary watch on my arm and playfully opened my eyes wide in pretend fear. "Oh shit, looks like we're already late so..." Yeah, right.

I tried to squeeze past Cullen, but he stopped me before I had a chance to escape. Once again, so happy to be a weak little girl.

"Bella" ,he said, suddenly looking all serious. I certainly preferred the smiley-thingi to this look. Stop looking at me like that, stop looking at me like that, stop looking -

"I want you to... well... I just want you to know that it doesn't matter what you say, I will always be there for you and defend your honor whenever these douche bags dare to hit on you. You're worth it.".

Oh shit, now I was blushing. Like... tomato blushing. I had to get out of there. Now!

"Oh... well... thank you, Cullen. I guess. So... see you later" ,I said rushed and then followed the only life concept I would dare set my signature under: Grin – duck – and run!

"See ya, Swan!" , was all I heard as I headed towards the other end of school.

Well, let's hope not all too soon.

The rest of the school day passed by without any other major complications. Well, actually I had to borrow some money from Alice at lunch which she only commented on by asking if my financial problems were the reason for me wearing the exact same outfit twice in a time span of two weeks. But otherwise the day seemed to pass by rather smoothly.

Which means I didn't have to be confronted with Edward for the rest of the day. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I didn't know he was off, busy fucking Amy one last time for the sake of it, and believe me, it bugged me. Still, our fight earlier had kind of ruined being jealous for me. The way he treated other girls and the distinct separation between me and these girls was making one thing more than clear to me: My fantasy about Cullen eventually realizing that I was the right girl for him would always be just that – a fantasy. I would always stay in the freaking friends-only-collumn – population: me. Well and my future cats...

So I think it's understandable that I was feeling a little down as we were sitting at our usual table during lunch, shoving my food across the plate without actually eating it. The seat next to me – the one Cullen usually occupied – was like a mocking sign of my ultimate failure and so I tried to ignore it as good as possible. But obviously that was easier said than done. Evertime I caught a glimpse of it out of the corner of my eye I had to sigh.

But unfortunately my moping didn't go by unnoticed.

"Hey, Bella-B, what's wrong?" ,Emmett asked as I had sighed for about the thousandth time. I only shrugged – ok, when I look at it now I see that I was acting way over the top, but honestly, I didn't give a shit by then.

"Oh come on!" ,Alice next to me answered for me as I didn't continue, "She and Edward got into a fight. Something about Tyler."

Completely shocked I turned towards her. "How the hell do you know that?"

But now it was her time to shrug. "Gossip travels fast, Bella. And you weren't exactly discrete about it."

In front of me I saw Rosalie nodding. "Yeah, Bella. I've heard about it, too. Someone even said that they saw you and Edward making up afterwords in the janitors closet, but I guess we all know _that_ didn't happen."

I could only gape. God, this school was so much like _Gossip Girl_ it wasn't even funny.

"So... erm... shit. Well, okay so what... Cullen and I had fights before. It's not like we were breaking up or something."

"Yeah, especially because you'd have to be in a relationship for that, but whatever." ,Alice mumbled, but I heard her just fine.

"Thank's for reminding me Alice. I appreciate that." , I replied glaring at her, but she didn't seem to give a flying fuck as she just kept on eating her salad. The cheek of her!

"Come on, Bells." ,Emmett said, interrupting my fury-stare "you know Eddie-boy is bound to get sick of his whoring ways sooner or later. And we all know when this day comes it's gonna be you who he's gonna sweep off her feet and ride into the sunset with"

I really wanted to punch him for that crap, but unfortunately he was sitting too far away. But thank God for the special bond that goes beyond words that Rose and I share. Therefore the next thing I know is Rose smacking Emmett square over the back of his head.

"Ow, Rosie!" ,he whined and grabbed his head. But Rosalie, the ice-queen didn't even look at him.

"Shut it, you big goon!" ,she said instead and pointed at his food. "Keep eaten. At least that's gonna shut your mouth."

God, at least my life will never be boring with these guys around.

I drove home with Alice and Jasper instead of going in Rosalies Mercedes again. Nobody said anything about it, but I knew they were all very well aware of that fact that I was trying to avoid a certain someone, who might or might not have waited leaning against Rosalies car after last period. And yes, I was just to chicken to face a confrontation with him right about now.

So as I fastened my seat belt in the backseat of Alice's yellow Porsche – lucky fucking her! - I could see her and Jasper whispering to each other, while glancing at me in turns.

"God, just talk out loud." ,I said after I had enough, "I know you're talking about me anyways. Just say it."

Jasper only looked at his girlfriend, before he turned his head towards me.

"We were just saying that we thought it... erm.. we both agreed that it might be time for you to start looking for someone else than Edward." He gulped hard after he finished, while Alice started the car and put it in first gear. As it seems our hobby psychiatrist Jasper Whitlock was actually embarrassed. How cute.

I just snorted as we pulled out of the school parking lot. ""Get over it, Jas. It's not like I don't know that already. What do you think me and your girlfriend talk about beside you of course. And shopping. And Robert Pattinson"

Obviously that caught Alice's attention. "God, yeah... he's dreamy"

"Hey!"

"Oh come on Jasper. He doesn't hold a candle to you of course, but still, you can't deny that he's a hunk."

Jasper only frowned. "You're only saying that because he's British. If it weren't for his annoying accent you woulnd't even look at him."

"Well first of all" ,Alice replied, "I'd obviously still be looking at him as he's starring in this great new chick-flick that's in cinema right now... what's it called again, Bells?"

I only lifted my hands in defiance. "Hey, don't look at me. I don't even like the actor, let alone the movie."

But Alice wasn't even listening. "Well, doesn't matter... oh yeah and second of all, you mister should be more than grateful that I have this little thing for accents."

"And why is that, Ma'am?" , be asked emphasizing his stupid southern drawl which he clearly new made Alice go mentally retarded. As she tried to keep at least enough control of the vehicle in order not to wrap us all around a tree he sat back in his seat, smiling like the cat that got the canary.

Gotta love your friends... even when they're weird.

We eventually – and to be quite honest a little surprisingly – arrived at my place and I didn't even hesitate to get out of the deathtrap that is a car with a swooning Alice behind the wheel. I mean I love her and I guess Jaspers alright, too, but these two really give me a reason to leave the country sometimes.

"So see you tomorrow in school?" ,Alice asked through the window when I was already halfway up the driveway. But thank god she did.

"Oh... about that... would it be alright if you like... pick me up or something?" I tried to give her a nice and pleading smile but honestly, i've never been one to practice in front of a mirror so... it might aswell look like me pulling a funny face but who cares.

Alice, as the nice and understanding person that she is, only smiled back.

"No."

I'll take it all back. That bitch!

"Why the hell not?"

"Because I'm not gonna support you avoiding Edward again! We all know how that ended last time."

Thanks for reminding me, Alice. The last time I'd "avoided" Cullen had ended in me looking like a freaking albino with my eyes so red and puffy and my skin so pale and dull from all the crying. Well yeah, and him having an affair with our English teacher, who was on an internship but got kicked out when they found out about her fucking one of the students. Obviously they never knew it was Edward, but come on... everybody with a brain could have made that assumption.

So I did the last thing I could in order to change Alice' mind: I whined. "Pretty please, Alice. Please please, please... I really don't want to talk to him right now... that fight was really nasty and I don't want to be too close to him before we both cool off a little so pleeeeeease..."

Of course it didn't work.

"No way, Bells. You and Edward need to grow up and finally start talking about your problems instead of shouting at each other. So no. Ask Rosalie."

And without another word she speed off.

Shaking my head I turned around and walked towards the frontdoor.

I really needed to think of something so I wouldn't have to see Edward too soon. But once again, of course one couldn't prevent the things that are bound to happen...

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so, what did you think? Good, bad, what the hell? Let me know!

Oh yeah, and if anybody feels like being my beta, just... you know... PRETTY PLEASE! :)

have a good one! elitess


	3. Chapter 2

Hey how is everyone?

I have to say i'm actually in a great mood today. You probably don't know, but the weather here in Berlin has been SHIT-TY! for like the past 6 month (or what feels like it) and for the last few days it's been really nice, so my mood is improving aswell. Right on time, as i am celebrating my 20th birthday by the very end of april and am VERY thankful that i won't have to do so in my winter coat ;)

So i hope whereever you are that you have a nice and sunny day aswell. :D

So anyway, I decided to take this day off – only had one bio-chemestry course today so... screw it ;) - and have been writing all sorts of things. Including a new chapter.

Hope you like it and I hope you let me know if you do. And thank you lilyisnotmyname for your comment! LOTS of love from Germany.

**BTW - I still don't have a beta, sooooo... if anyone is volunteering?! (YOu have to imagine me grinning creepily at you while blinking my eyes like a retarded owl)**

Well anywhooooo... here it comes:

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**Chapter 2**

I was just sitting in my room, researching Epi-Genetics on my computer, once again wondering how the hell I could convince Charlie to buy me a freaking laptop, when suddenly there was a tap on my window.

Breathing heavily I turned around and wasn't surprised to see Edward sitting on the branch outside of my room. I'd been telling him for ages to quit sneeking in as I always suffered a close heart attack when he would knock on my window and because I was scared to death about Edward possibly falling and – no, can't even think about that. But obviously Mr. Know-it-all never listened to anything I said.

So for about the thousandth time in my life went over to the window and opened it. A few seconds later a soaking wet Edward stood in front of me, dripping all over my carpet.

"Went for a late night swim, I see" ,I joked humorlessly as I closed the window once again.

"Yeah, thought I'd have to add some training into my night-routine. I think I might have neglected my abs a little." And of course he had to pull his drenched shirt over his head, revealing his freaking hot six pack. I hate you universe.

"Would you please put that on again. Charlies still up and I don't really want him coming in here with you looking all naked and shit."

That seemed to crack him up. "Bella, the chief has known me since I was a little child and I believe he's seen me "all naked and shit" quite a lot already. I don't think he'd even notice."

"Well, don't you think people being used to you walking around half dressed is something you might want to think about again?" ,I asked, my eyes never leaving the spot right below his eyes. It's the best trick I was ever told: If you want to avoid direct eye-contact but have the person you're talking to believe your actually confident enough to look right into saids eyes you just have to focus on the spot right below. This way they'll never know your just faking it.

But of course you also have to remember this: Never try this trick on the person that taught it to you.

"You know, maybe YOU might wanna rethink why you seem to be the only person in this universe who feels offended by me taking off my shirt, especially when it's fucking drenched. You really need to loosen up a little, Bells. And I've noticed you're not meeting my eyes but doing the spot below thing again. You know I didn't tell you about that shit so you could pull it on me."

"Well, then, don't teach me stuff!" Yeah, I see how one might consider my attitude a little on the bitchy side, but... erm... hormones?!

Cullen must have been immune to it as he just kept looking at me. For a few moments we just stood there in complete silence, studying each others expressions and estimating whether to make the first move or not. Thank god my face must have given him some sort of a signal to go first, as he eventually frowned and walked over to the bed, sitting down on it.

"Look Bella, I'm just-" ,he started, fumbling with the shirt in his hands like he was looking for a secret note on it, that might tell him the right thing to say. And honestly, I couldn't take seeing him this clueless.

"Yeah, no it's... its nothing. I know what you're gonna say and I erm... let's just say we we're both a little off today. Not our best performance."

"Yeah..."

"And erm... you can put your wet clothes in the dryer, if you want to. Charlie's still up. He won't mind giving you some of his things."

To my utter surprise he actually nodded and left the room without any further ado. As I heard his footsteps on the stairs I felt a huge relieve flush through my entire body. Wow, didn't even realise I was THIS tense.

Downstairs I heard Cullen talk to my father, who – and honestly, I should feel offended, as he just nods at me whenever I come home – seemed to greet him like a long lost son. I actually heard him laugh. And Charlie hardly aver really laughs. Probably because Edward was just telling him about me freaking out over his naked chest. Hardy har. And let's not forget har.

Would like to see these two confronted with their dream girls walking into their bedrooms and then stripping out of their clothes... oh wait. No, NONONO, I take it back. I don't want to see that. I mean yes, i'd be heartbroken to see Edward get excited over another girl but my Dad... urg.

Can't even think about it.

So I won't.

Let's think about something else.

Balloons. No. Too... graphic.

Kittens. Arg, that reminds me of the word pussy and … . Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick.

"Bella?"

Thank you, whoever you are up there. Seriously, thank you!

"Huh?" Looking up I saw a very amused looking Edward Cullen smirking at me from the doorway. By now he had changed into one of Dad's flannel shirts, but hadn't bothered to button it up, so his naked chest was still very much on display. Cocky asshole.

But honestly, who cares. Still way better than thinking about my Dad like this... urg and there it is again.

Apparently my disgust must have shown on my face as Cullen suddenly started chuckling. "What are you thinking about? Must be quite entertaining judging from the way you were zoned out just sec-"

"No, nothing entertaining." ,I interrupted and started flailing around in order to distract him. But obviously he just laughed louder.

"Wow, now I REALLY want to know what you were thinking about. You look like a tomato with sunburn." ,he said still smiling like an idiot and walked over to my bed, plopping down onto the mattress. It's weird how this simple move made my heart swoon. He was so comfortable around me. Why couldn't he also be comfortable with kissing me -

"Bells?"

Yeah, out again.

"What?! Oh, no... it was nothing. Just... my Dad seems to like you way better than he likes me. He never greets me this friendly when I come home from school. And I am the one who feeds him every freaking day. Quite ungrateful if you ask me. I make sure he doesn't starve and nothing. But you just have to look a little wet and he's all over it."

As Cullen cracked up again I sat down on the floor next to the bed, leaning my head against the wall. I couldn't sit in bed with a half naked Edward. I mean yeah, we had slept in the same bed numerous times, but always, and I mean it, ALWAYS, fully clothed.

Apperently, though, Cullen didn't seem to care.

"What are you doing on the floor? Come up here." ,he smiled at me, patting the spot right beside him.

So I did the only thing I could think of: Grin and bear it.

"You know, i'm fine down here actually. The mattress is way too soft for me anyways. " ,i lied.

Yeah, could have done better. Me and Edward both know my mattress is awesome.

Suddenly Cullens smile fell, his eyes looking down at his hands like he was ashamed. I waited for him to say what it was that suddenly seemed to bother him, but it took quite a while before his open mouthed fish-movements turned into words: "So I guess you're still pissed about this morning."

That I didn't expect. Usually I was the one to come up with uncomfortable topics. This must have really been bugging him.

"Well... I don't know. I guess I am." ,i eventually admitted. And I really was. It was just then that I noticed how annoyed I still was, thinking about his behavior back in school.

"I mean you keep treating me like a small kid. It fucking sucks, if you want to know."

Again he needed quite some time to answer. "I'm sorry, Bella." ,he eventually said. I couldn't see his face as he was now lying on his back, his face towards the ceiling, but I could hear the worry in his voice. Good. Maybe he would get it now.

"It's just... I mean yeah, I know you're not a child. Believe me, I know. You should hear the guys talking about you in the looking rooms. It's quite disturbing actually. But that's just it – I don't want them to talk about you the way I would talk about the girls I date. You are so much more to me than just a girl. So... I get pissed off when I hear other guys talking about you like you're just one of these bitchy girls. Because you're not. I mean you are a girl and... urg, yeah and I guess I get that you... you know... want to be like them in a way, but Bella - " and suddenly he turned around and his face was right next to mine, "you deserve so much more than them. You deserve a fucking knight on a freaking white horse with a rose between his teeth and... I don't know. All the clicheed shit you can think of Not just some horny disgusting teenage boy who wants to bend you over and fuck you from behind."

Okaaaay. A little graphic but it would do. For a moment we just looked at each other and suddenly I wasn't mad anymore. Just... exhausted. He had me on a pedestal so far up in the sky it was impossible to reach for anybody. Including him. And honestly, it was quite hard to breath up here too.

"I get it, Ed. I really do. I guess I want the same for you but, well, it's not like you listen to me either. So just think about it like this: I want equality. You want to fuck some skank? Well, I won't stop you, never did. So you don't get to stop me if I want guys to hit on me. Just know, that whenever I might not like it I will deal with them myself. You just... stay out of it."

I felt like my speech had been pretty fucking good but Cullen didn't look too happy.

Running his hands trough his unrouly hair he eventually sighed, his eyes closed like he couldn't bear looking at me at the moment. Hypocrite.

"I don't know if I can do that. I honestly don't know."

"Well, you'll have to. Or..." , and suddenly I had an idea, "or I will start screwing up each and every booty call you make. I'll give you fake herpes or something -"

"I don't think that would keep the girls from wanting some of this." ,he said gesturing towards his entire body, now grinning like the Cheshire cat. Sometimes I really think he is bipolar.

"Yeah, whatever", I said, giving him the one-eyebrow-raise, "just know I'll ruin you're sexcapades if you don't stop being all grumpy grandpa on my ass. I mean, since when are you such a puritan?"

"Hey, I'm not that bad. And what do you mean with puritan? I'll have you know my reputation sheet is pure white -"

"You fucked our substitute teacher on her second day of work. Maybe you think you're sheet is white because just like light it's made of every freaking color you can think of."

Cullens eyes narrowed to tiny little slits listening to me smart-ass him, but then he just smirked at me mischievously. "Yeah, I don't think we'll have any more problems with teenage guys if you keep being such a nerd."

Now I had to snort. "Tse, fuck you Cullen. Look at who's talking. Mr. It's-whoooooom."

"At least I don't wear fudgly glasses."

Now that really was too much. "What the hell are you talking about? And seriously Cullen – fudgly?! Really? And anyway, you're the one who needs freaking grandpa-glasses so you can read. At least I wear contacts."

"Yeah, well whatever. The ladies dig it. You wouldn't believe how often I get head offered to me when I wear them in school. I crazy, really."  
"Urg, seriously, go screw yourself. You're incorrigible."

And with that we both started laughing our asses off. This is what our friendship was all about. We would fight and hate each other, but in the end it always resulted in a fit of laughter.

After what felt like ages we stopped giggling and eventually just sat there smirking at each other.

"It's quite late." ,Cullen finally said, but didn't move yet, "maybe I should go."

I just rolled my eyes. "Don't be ridiculous. You don't even have clothes. You can stay here tonight."

Well, couldn't say getting what he wanted didn't make him happy.

"Thanks Bella. I really appreciate it. Although I think I look fucking sexy in your Daddys clothes." ,with that he sat up at started posing like a body builder, flexing and everything.

I nearly barfed on the spot.

"Believe me, to me you really don't" , I said with my nose wrinkled in disgust and got up onto my feet. "And don't give me shit about being grateful. I know you already told Esme and Dr. C you would stay here tonight. Don't forget I know you better than anybody else does. Including you. Aaaand... talking about sexy Dads -"

"Don't you dare, Isabella Marie Swan! As far as I'm concerned and as far as you should be concerned too my Dad is ugly and smells like fish." ,he said getting up himself.

I couldn't help but laugh at his freaked out face. "Yeah, I don't think so, Edman. You're Dad might just be the most sexy man on this planet. I'm seriously jealous of Esme sometimes."

Again his face looked like I had just told him I liked to eat raw baby bunnys.

"You disgust me, Bella Swan." ,he said turning his back to me. "And you insult me, too. I believe we all know that I AM the most sexy man on this planet."

And in one swift movement he pulled the shirt from his body and turned back around with a sexy smile on his fucking gorgeous face. With the look of a wild cat figuring out it's prey he marched straight up to me, so his naked freaking chest was pressed against mine. Erm, my CLOTHED chest. Just making sure everyone's clear on that.

"Say it, Bella." ,he purred, looking me straight in the eye. And seriously, I had to remind myself how to breath properly so I wouldn't pass out. "Say I am the most sexy person on this planet."

And then, fuck, I felt his hand on the small of my back, arching me even further into him. Good god.

"You are..."

"Go on."

"You are the -" ,swallow drool, "-most sexy man on this planet."

"Ha!" ,Cullen shouted, letting go of me in order to jump up and down like a little girl. Big mistake!

I watched him bounce around for a little while before I said: "-Except for you're droolworthy father!" ,and started mimicking his jumps. "OH DOCTOR CULLEN!"

"Don't you dare. Stop it right now!" , Cullen said, now glaring at me and not jumping anymore. But honestly, I didn't give a shit. His face was fucking worth it.

"You're the only one that can cure my aking!"

"BELLA!"

"MY AKING FOR YOU, CARLISLE!"

"That's enough!" And with that he jumped at me and lifted me up over his shoulder, with me in hysterics.

"Oh please, someone call a sexy doctor! DOCTOR CULLEN"

"You -"

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?"

After Cullen had put me down we both stood there looking like idiots while my father kept glaring at us from the door. Eventually though Cullen explained the scenario to Charlie, who just looked at me like he couldn't believe I was his daughter, shaking his head. Then he turned around, said it was time for bed, wished us a good night and shut the door.

Let's just say the name Carlisle or Dad wasn't mentioned any further.

xxxxxx

The rest of the week progressed without further incidents. Everyone was happy to know that Edward and I had gotten over ourselfs and stopped acting like stubborn kids – Alice's words, not mine – and therefore everything was back to normal.

Well, not everything.

Because the only thing that worried me was that as the week progressed Cullen seemed to become more quiet by the day. On Tuesday everything was fine: He joked with me and our friends, was attentive in class and flirted with the cheerleaders during gym. But as Wednesday passed by, aswell as Thursday I wasn't the only one who noticed a change in him.

"Is it just me or do you also feel like Edward just entered his menopause?" ,Emmett said to me and Rose after school on Thursday. Edward still had practice, as did Emmett, who's just wanted to take his girlfriend to her car before returning to the locker rooms.

As I just nodded Rose snorted.

"Not just menopause. It's like someone took away his favourite toy ever: His dick. I mean I say Stanley offer him a BJ at lunch but he DECLINED!"

We both gaped at her. Cullen had never ever before declined any kind of sexual favors. Even from a slut like Jessica Stanley .Or rather _especially _from a slut like Stanley.

"Maybe something's up with Dr. C and Esme?" ,I suggested, but Emmett just shook his head.

"I was at his place yesterday and when I came into the house I found his parents making out in the kitchen. I don't think they are the problem."

"Maybe he's sick." ,I guessed again, but to my surprise Rosalie only started laughing.  
"Yeah, in the head. But that's nothing new", she said, earning a glare from me.

"Whatever, Rose. I'll just ask him tomorrow."

And so I did. But I guess he didn't want to talk to me about it, as he just said he was fine and kept on doodling onto his biology work sheet. And believe me, it freaked me the fuck out. I mean yes, we fought all the time, but we never really kept things from each other. Well, except for the fact that I was madly in love with him ever since I could think back, put that's not the point.

So I just left him alone, watching him get more and more miserable by the minute.

And before I knew it it was the weekend and Sunday came around. And let me tell you that I wasn't surprised to have Cullen call me in the morning telling me he couldn't make it over to my place for our usual study session. I didn't even bother to ask why. I was afraid to have him answer. Because at that point my head had managed to come up with a bunch of reasons for Cullens moping with one way more scaring and unfortunately way more probable than all the others combined: Cullen must be unlucky in love.

xxxx

Finally this horrible Sunday turned into Monday and I believe me when I say that I wasn't looking forward to this day at all. And especially the drive to school.

But at quarter to eight (ten minutes too late) I heard a honk outside me house. Cullens car had been repaired ever since Thursday, but today was the first day we returned back to our usual routine of him picking me up. I actually considered faking being sick, but then decided against it.

I wouldn't be a coward. And it was Charlies day off and believe me when I say that my Dad could actually smell fake illnesses from a mile away.

So I got into the shiny silver Volvo waiting for me in front of my house and to my absolute surprise found Cullen inside in a fucking jolly mood.

"Hey, Bells" ,he greeted as I pulled on my seat belt, smiling like a toothpaste model. I just blinked at him.

Which, of course, made him laugh as he started the car and speed off to school.

I actually felt like I was going insane.

So let's just say that by the time we arrived at school I was still confused as to what had been up his butt the last few days but was accepting the fact that he seemed to be his usual self again in any way. Or at least until I brought up the courage to grill him about it.

"So... would you like to go to the cinema later on. I really want to see this new G. movie and I know you want to too." ,he said winking at me – WINKING! - as he closed the cardoor behind me (which he had also opened for me, just so you know. Freaking weird).

"Erm... sure." I said and looked at him smirking from the corner of my eyes.

"Great." ,he said and smiled at me as we started walking towards school. We were a little late, but there were still quite a lot of pulils out and about in the parking lot.

So when I felt a hand on my hip I turned to my left thinking it must have been some jerk trying to make fun of me, but to my surprise there was nobody there. Only -

"Cullen, what the hell are you doing?" , I shrieked, trying to turn out of his grip, but seriously, it's a lot harder that I would have ever thought.

"Just keep on walking, Bella. We're late already and I don't feel like getting detention today" , He said, pushing me forward, still grinning from ear to ear. I couldn't have been more shocked if he pulled out a base ball bat and hit me over the head with it.

"Well, alright but... would you please" I desperately tugged on his hand on my hip as we kept walking, but he wouldn't let go, just chuckled quietly next to me and pulled me even closer to his body. Eventually I gave up and moaned: "Oh come on, Edward. You know that I don't like... well, this stuff so please -" But Eric Yorkie, one of Edwards teammates, appeared in front of us and interrupted my words, by shouting:

"Hey Edward, about time you and the bird made it. You know what they say, quiet waters are deep and dir -" But that's when Edwards fist made Eric shut up. I stood there in shock. Like in proper shock. I hadn't even seen him move let alone felt it, yet I definitely just witnessed him pummeling the school idiot in front of my eyes. I mean... what the hell? Did I fall asleep for a few seconds or what?! This day wasn't going the way I anticipated it at all...

Now that I looked up to see what was going on Edward just stared down at Eric, his eyes shooting daggers.

"Talk about her like that ever again, and I'll fucking kick your ass. Got that?"

He turned around and started making his way back over to my side.

"Hey Cullen" ,someone shouted just when he'd approached me, "how's you're new girlfriend?"

But Edward seemed to be way to occupied putting his damn hand on my hip again than to go punch that stupid idiot also. Thank god. Instead he just said: "Leave my girlfriend the fuck alone" and dragged me with him.

Pushing me away from the place where Eric was still rolling on the floor, Edward jumped right back into funny-dude-mode. By now I was almost sure that my bipolar theory was more than a little understated.

"So... what were we talking about?" He said casually smiling down on me. I just stared at him. Thinking back now I think I actually was is some kind of an emotional state of shock. But Cullen didn't even notice.

"Alright, I guess we were discussing how very nice it is of me to keep you walking steadily cast on my I dare say very well toned arm" Now he really smiled. Like i'm-so-freaking-clever-and-gorgeous-bla-bla-bla smile.

I shook my head as we climbed the stairs heading for the school front door.

"What the hell was that?" ,I asked once we were inside.

"What ever might it be you mean, Bella"

"Don't be like that, Edward. Why did you have to punch Eric? Couldn't you just... I don't know... growl or bark or something. Why bite?"

Cullen just shrugged, which made me move even closer to his side – involuntary obviously.

"Eric is a douche. He was bound to get it sooner or later. Better it being me defending you than Tyler beating the crap out of him for a less noble reason."

I didn't really know what to say. For some reason the argument we had a few days earlier still seemed to bother him more than I'd have thought. So instead of touching that topic again I just skipped to another – even more interesting – one:

"So, you've got a new girlfriend? Does that mean you are over your little moping phase?" Really, I tried not to sound too curious – and hurt – but clearly failed. Thankfully Edward isn't one of the attentive kind.

"Yes, I think so. But she's kind of different though" Different – that means she's Asian. Or Black. No offense.

"Oh alright. Good for you. But would you please let go of me now, because I feel kind of - "

"Come on, Bella. It's only a hand on a hip. Hardly even PG stuff. Don't get all worked up about it"

"Well, it might be no big deal for you, but it is for me. And I'm sure your new girlfriend wouldn't be all too happy about you erm.. touching me... like that, too." I grabbed his fingers and tried to loosen them, but even his fingers alone were stronger than both of my hands.

"Oh don't worry." He said, still walking, totally ignoring me and my rising panic attack. "She's still a little uncomfortable, but I think if you give it a bit of time she's gonna admit she actually likes it." Now that had me turn towards him.

"What the hell? Why would she like you being all cosy with other girls? Oh no... please don't tell me you hooked up with freaky Dana. You promised you wouldn't."

"What? No, urg, that's just wrong, Bells" he said shaking his head. Let's just say I was I little relieved. Dana was a girl a year younger than us and had been madly – and I mean it this time: MADLY – in love with Cullen from day one. She'd even send me a threatening letter one day, saying that she would make my life miserable if I was to take Edward from her. Needless too say that once she figured out the Cullen would never even consider me one of his girls she's apologized and stopped glaring at me during lunch. In gym the same day she even casme up to me and said that she was actually a little sad to hear that I wasn't Cullens girlsfriend. "We three could have had quite some fun" ,she said, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open and my eyes ready to pop out of their sockets.

Up until now, though, I had thought she and her family had moved back to California a few month ago, but seriously, with this kind of crazy one can never know.

"So... who is it then?" ,i asked, still curious (and still relieved). But Cullen just blinked at me innocently.

"Who is what?" You gotta be shitting me!

"Oh come on, Edward. The girl you hooked up with"

"We didn't hook up" My heart skipped a beat – again, totally involuntary.

"What? The almighty Edward Cullen didn't hook up with a girl on their first date -"

"Well... actually we haven't been on a date either. Not yet, that is"

What the hell was he talking about? I looked up at him only to see him smiling down at me. Again. Weird.

"I thought you said she was your girlfriend?!"

"She is. She most definitely is."

"But how the hell... oh... oh no, Edward please tell me she knows about all of this" I cousln't really believe it myself, but by now I actually felt kind of sorry for this girl. I mean I had known something weird was going on with Cullen, but I would have never thought he would go this freaking crazy.  
"Erm... well actually I haven't really told her, but she's also kind of failing to pick up all the clues I give her about our relationship-status"

"What kind of clues? And who is this poor girl anyway... do I know her?"  
"Yes Bella you know her. Not all too good, I'd say, but you definitely know her."

"Well, who is it?" ,I tried once again, but again failed.  
"You don't actually expect me to just tell you that easily, right" ,Cullen answered, smirking like the devil, but I wasn't intimidated by that.

"Well, in fact I do. So come on. Spill!"

We'd arrived at my English classroom. Finally he let go of my hip but still didn't move an inch. Luckily, as I had successfully (come on, more or less. I mean I got what I wanted, isn't that succeeding?) gotten rid of his hand, I was now free to move away myself.

But just as I did Edward reached out and grabbed my hand.

"What the hell, Cullen. In my world this is cheating first stadium. Let go" I tried to shake off his hand, but he just held on to it. What the hell was wrong with him? First the moping, now the clinginess. Maybe I should inform his parents...

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Why should anything be wrong with me?" I gestured towards our joined hands. He smirked. "I don't really get your point, Bella. I'm just holding my new girlfriends hand"

"My point is you shouldn't be holding some other girls hand if... erm... erm... what... what did you just..."

And there was the baseball bat. Right on the head.

But right in that moment the bell rang.

"Oh, ran out of time. We're gonna talk about all this stuff at lunchtime, alright."

And to my utter surprise he leaned forward an kissed the corner of my mouth. I froze. What the fuck. For everybody watching it must have looked like a proper kiss. Like a kiss on the lips. Like a kiss you give your...

"Bye, girlfriend!" He said and left, leaving me standing in the hallway like a person struck by lightning.

Shit, I was still sleeping and that was a very very realistic dream. Oh man, really very disturbing. Why wasn't I waking up?

"Miss Swan, do you care to join us or..."  
"Oh, sorry Mister Banner. Of course."

Very veeeeery fucking real...

* * *

Soooo... this is it. Let me know what you think :D

Oh and i'm a little curious: In this story the main characters are best friends, but.. what do you think? Should best friends become more than just friends? Or does that screw everything up?

I've been discussing that with a friend of mine and we don't come to a conclusion, that satisfies the both of us. As i've been in the situation before where a very very good friend of mind wanted more and i had to tell him no which he DIDN'T take tooooo well... but she says it's the best basis for a great relationship...

well, i looking forward to your answers ;)

Have a great day, you lovely ppl.

Yours, Elitess


	4. Chapter 3

Hey people...

I am SOOO sorry that it took me this long to update, but my fucking laptop wasn't working for the last couple of centuries it seems and I had to get it fixed first, than had to rewrite the chapter because the stupid piece of junk deleted the previous attempt and so on and so on...

but anyway, here it is. Hope you like it cold (lol, aren't I hilarious^^) ….

so erm... enjoy... oh and RR please C: Thank you very much

* * *

When I arrived in the cafeteria at lunch-time it was already packed with students sitting, standing and leaning on their tables. Walking through the crowd I watched out for a certain red headed weirdo, only to finally see him sitting at our usual table. Surrounded by all our friends.

I felt like I was gonna die. I mean, I'd never been this nervous like... ever before.

"Hey Bells, how's it goin?" Emmett boomed as I arrived at the table and I felt relieve rushing through my body. Thank god, everything was just a daydream, nothing unusual at all. All still the same old stuff.

Unfortunately the only free chair was right next to Edward who, for some weird reason, looked a lot more happen than usually. As I took my seat, it felt like everybody was watching me.

"What?"

"Nothing Bella. Just... curious." Rose said mischievously. What the hell?

"Curious about what?"

"Well, I don't know Bella" Alice started, suddenly looking pissed. "Maybe about when you were gonna tell us, and with that I mean me, about your new boyfriend"

"Oh..." I looked at Edward – something I would regret later on as he smirked when he saw me looking and then reached out, grabbed my chair (MY CHAIR... WITH ME ON IT!) and pulled it towards him. Before there was any time for me to react and stop Edward, he'd already leaned down and kissed my temple. My cheeks flamed in dark bright red, as I felt like dying immediately.

Rose only laughed, than looked at her friend still pounding in her chair. "Oh come on, Alice. Give them a break. We all knew they were gonna get together eventually."

"Well yeah" Alice admitted, what shocked me even more. Why wasn't I saying anything? What the hell was wrong with my mouth?!

But fortunately Emmett jumped in: "Yeah, and it really is about time that our little Bella over here hands over her v-card to -"

"SHUT UP, EMMETT!"

Edward had shouted so loud, it kept ringing in my ears for ages. Somehow in the middle of all the crazy going on he'd managed to bring his hand back to my hip – go get a fucking shrink, you've become a serious reoffender – which now pushed me forward, as he sat up in order to tell Emmett off.

Said dickhead only lifted his hands. "Sorry, dude – locker room talk?"

Edwards eyes shoot wide open, which apparently was answer enough – even for Emmett.

"Alright. Got it. Do not talk about Bellas v-card again. Ever. At least not in front of – alright, alright. No talking. Starting now"

That must really be a dream, I thought. If this was reality I'd have died of embarrassment by now. That's for sure. And of confusion. And maybe a tiny concussion...

"It's not like that guys. Just... calm down – yes I mean you Alice." , Edward said laughing, whereas Alice just shrunk in her seat a bit more (I wouldn't have been surprised if she's just imploded and vanished). "Bella and I... you know... we didn't really want to make a big deal out of it, so... we would appreciate you guys doin' the same thing. Especially you two" With that he pointed at Emmett and Alice. Everybody started laughing except me. I guess I could have faked it, but... no... I wasn't even able to do that. I could only stare into space like the left out retard I was.

"Oh come on, Bella-buh. I'm sorry for making fun of Eddi popping your cherry. I really didn't mean to -"

"FOR CHRIST SAKE, EMMETT!"

"Oh damn it, did it again. I just mean that -"

"Just shut the fuck up, will you!" Edward shouted and then turned to me. Which excited, confused and scared me at the same time.

"Don't listen to him, Bells. He's gonna get used to us soon and knock off the retarded comments." ,he said smirked and then, once again without... I don't know... asking me or something, leaned down and kissed the corner of my mouth. Only a bit less corner and more mouth this time. A lot more mouth. More like... full on MOUTH.

I froze, but couldn't help closing my eyes in response. I mean, sue me, I'm only a girl and he is freaking Edward Cullen, for crying out loud.

It lasted a lot longer than the previous peck. And, once again taking me by surprise, this time Edward didn't feel like keeping his hands to himself aswell. Though an innocent gesture putting his hand on my cheek cupping it in a loving manner made me swoon more than the kiss alone had already. His lips moving on mine didn't help. Dear lord, I was so gonna die of too much stress causing my heart to... explode. So I went with it and kissed him back. If it was the last thing I would do in any way...

"Oh look at them now, Ali. Do you really want to keep up that grudge?! They are happy, as you should be" Rose said, while Edward and I just continued. The only response I heard was a tiny high pitched "Whatever" from Alice.

Finally- or unfortunatly, there's always two sides to a coin – Edward released my lips and let go of my cheek. I felt dizzy. I felt high. I was freaking melted to a little puddle on the floor.

When I opened my eyes in order to face reality again I kind of wished I hadn't, though, because Edwards cocky smile and the pleased faces of my friends watching us made me realize what had just happened.

I had kissed Edward.

No, wait!

Edward had kissed me. HE had kissed ME.

I and Edward had kissed each other.

IN FRONT OF EVERYBODY!

That could only mean one thing...

Frowning I leaned back in my chair and faced the group. "I'm dreaming, right? Or dead... am I dead?" ,i asked confused, but they only cracked up laughing. Loud. Stupid people, gaining amusement out of other peoples confusion!

"Oh shit Edward!" Emmett roared between hysterical breaths. "You messed up your girls brain A LOT!"

He kept on laughing even after I starting giving him the death stare, as did the rest of the group. Not even that worked today... well... it never really had before, but that didn't matter, right?!

Even Edward next to me was shaking of laughter. "Oh Baby, that was genius. You certainly know how to boost a guys ego!" When he also started patting my leg I finally had enough.

Leaping to my feet I clenched my fists to my sites. "Edward... erm... a word?!" I gave him the "no excuses, it's a matter of life or life in utter shame"-look, just to make sure he got the message. Which he did.

Still laughing he got up aswell, ONCE AGAIN putting his arm around my hips.

"Excuse me Ladies and Jasper" , he said smirking, which made our friends laugh once again (except for Emmett, who seemed a little lost) "it seems my lovely new girlfriend claims me just for herself right now"

Damn, he definitely did not get the message at all.

Anyway, once we departed from our friends table and were out of earshot I turned to him in fury: "What the fuck is going on here, Edward – .ah! (he'd wanted to interrupt me)... don't you dare be funny right now, because I swear I'm gonna make a scene and ruin your stupid reputation!"

But obviously he didn't give a damn about my threat.

"Oh dear Bella, you sure you don't want me to take you to the nurse? I think you have some kind of swoon-delusion-state going on. I mean I always knew I was a great kisser, but now I actually think I should be given some kind of an award... like "Mr. Incubus of the century" or something."

I let him talk all the way through the school hallways. First of all because there was no chance in hell, that I was able to stop him anyway and second of all... well, don't judge me, but he was talking about us kissing so... not a bad topic, one might say. Oh and with one I mean me.

As we exited the building through the back door though, I finally held up my hand.

"Shut up!" ,I said loud and firmly.

Funnily enough he did. That's a first, I thought. I must have really looked pissed off.

Taking a deep breath I crossed my arms over my chest before looking at the crazy mad man in front of me (And just so you know, mad or not, he still looked gorgeous).

"Edward Anthony Cullen... I'm not really sure how to do this and please excuse my language when I say... ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE? What the hell is wrong with you? Did you fall on your head or did some skank FINALLY fuck your brain out? Because believe me, if there is no reasonable explanation for all the crazy going on today and actually I fear there isn't... Edward, you know you're my best friend and I like you a lot, but I might have to call the guys with the funny white jackets that close on the back!"

I felt my face heating up in fury as I tried to catch my breath. Damn, screaming at someone is exhausting.

Cullen looked at least a little ashamed (there you go, good boy!) as he ran his hands through his – gorgeous – hair.

"I guess I should have talked to you before I – "

"You guess?!" It felt like my eyes might pop out of their sockets, that's how wide I opened them.

"Sorry Bella, I mean I am really sorry... I though it might be funny... " He smirked, but I didn't give in.

" Oh... did you, really? Well, let me tell you something: It wasn't! I mean, Cullen... what the hell? We've known each other for ages and you know I don't like people touching me so how could you even think – "

"First of all" Edward said interrupting me, " I am not people. I have been your best friend for the past twelve years so please excuse me for assuming me touching you might be different to other guys and second of all... I think what I said before came out wrong. I didn't do it in order to have a good laugh, Bella. I thought surprising you might be funny, but apparently it wasn't so I am sorry about that." He paused for a second and I used the chance.

"But I don't... I mean... why... why would you like... touch me... like that... fuck Cullen, you know I didn't mean that when I told you I wanted to be... you know... treated like a girl girl by guys. I really didn't. And I certainly don't want your pity."

I had just said the last word when Edward suddenly leaped forward, cupping my shoulders in both of his huge hands. Oh dear... I felt trapped and safe all at the same time... this day was getting weirder by the second. But I guess I shouldn't be complaining... and his fingers on my bare skin felt soooooo gooooood...

"Bella!"

Oops, must have zoned out for a minute. Sorry about that. With my cheeks flaming scarlet I looked up only to see Cullen looking right into my eyes. Okay, now I really think he was trying to kill me.

"What?" , I managed to mumble. God, why am I so very retarded sometimes?

Edwards grip and eyes stayed serious though. "Would you please let me explain why I acted the way I did today? Because I think you totally misunderstood me..."

Oh shit, he was fucking with me. It had been a fucking joke. And he knew I didn't think it was funny because I actually wished for it to be real and now he was repelled by me. He wouldn't ever talk to me again, the ugly loser who thought Edward Cullen would kiss her because he wanted to and who'd been to stupid to see that he'd only been joking and –

"Damn it Bella!" Cullen shaking me like a rattle made me come back to reality.

"Sorry, I was just – " I started excusing my incapability of being normal, but Edward seemed to be fed of with it already.

"Shut up, will you! I know you have started making up some kind of shit in that crazy little head of yours already and I really need you to stop and better fucking listen. Can you do that?"

I nodded. What else was I supposed to do, was I able to do... but nod. And drool maybe.

"Great... so... well I guess I see now that I handled this whole thing absolutely wrong. So... let me tell you first of all that I did not touch you out of pity. I mean damn it Bells, how can you think so little of yourself."

He took a deep breath and let go of my shoulders, which made me struggle with keeping up my balance on my own. I just hope he didn't notice...

Frustration showing in his handsome face, Edward pinched the bridge of his nose with two fingers, just like he always did when there was something annoying going on.

"Bella... I thought a lot about our talk the other day and I... I... I figured that I didn't like the idea of you being a target for all these morons in there" He gestured towards the school "And I know you don't like being hit on as well, don't tell me you do, because I know you better than you know yourself. So... and well, you said this thing about me not being able to handle a real relationship and I figured you might have been right in that point. So I thought... I just thought... oh man, it sounds really stupid saying it out loud, but I just wanted to kill two birds with one stone. So I thought it might be a good idea for me and you to be a couple. "

He paused in order for the information to sink in properly. And believe me, it did.

"You erm... he?" Yeah, sunk right through me and into the ground.

I must have looked totally confused, because it actually made Cullen laugh.

"Oh damn it, I'm sorry, Bells. I guess it was kind of presumptuous of me so assume you'd be okay with the whole idea, but believe me, I just wanted the best for the both of us. If you were to be my girlfriend nobody would ever dare to hit on you again and I wouldn't have to deal with these shallow girls anymore, too. You know... I am so sick of talking about how Ryan Reynolds it so super hot and how he and Blake Lively do not go together AT ALL"

That's one of the many things I love about Edward the most – even though I felt like crushing his head on the pavement he still managed to make me love him even more. Even if it only was him making fun of Amy and them lot. God, how much I hated these bitches...

So I laughed and Cullen joined me and for a second it felt like nothing weird had ever happened between us. But obviously one can't forget about a scenario as the one in the cafeteria just like that.

"Cullen... I mean... I see now why you... you know... erm... well, you know what I mean. But I don't think it is such a good idea." I pressed my lips together so I wouldn't say "Even though I wish it was". Seriously, would someone please finally cure me from this madness called love?

"And why is that, Bella?" ,Edward asked.

I swallowed before answering. Why was I protesting against him and me acting like a couple again? Oh, now I remember: "Because nobody's going to believe we're actually together. It's totally absurd."

Now Edward looked confused. "I don't get what you're saying"

Maybe I should speak up a bit. "I said I don't think anybody's gonna believe you and I – "

"I heard you" , Edward interrupted. "I just don't get it. Why wouldn't they?"

Please don't make me say it, I thought. Please, please, please don't make me...

"Because it's just unbelievable."

"And why would that be?"

"Because... well... you're you and I am... well me" he wanted to protest, but I didn't let him. "And besides, it's just like you said before: We've been friends forever. It's so very unlikely for us to become a couple now after so many years, especially with you being so experienced and stuff and me … not"

But surprisingly Edward didn't seem to get my point.

"That's bullshit, Bella. A lot of friends get together even though they've been friends for decades. We're young. So why shouldn't we figure out that we're in love now?"

Because we're not! Or at least you're not, I thought. But I didn't say a word.

"And besides" , Edward continued, " I think it's very believable. You've heard Rose and Alice in there. Why shouldn't others believe what our friends believed so easily?"

Damn, I forget how clever he could be. What a shame that good-looking and smart do actually go together once in a while. It's just unfair in a way. Now I had to make up a new excuse...

"Well.. alright, maybe you're right. But still, it's not really the type of relationship I was looking for. I mean Edward, you... you don't really love me – no! Do not say you do, because you know I don't mean it like that... I just never thought about my first boyfriend only being with me because he's sick of everybody else. That's like being picked by default!"

Ha, let's see what you say about that!

But to my utter surprise Edward actually looked hurt. Oh shit...

"Bella, I am sorry. I didn't even think about it being the first time in a relationship for you. I really don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with, but..." His hand touched his forehead as he closed his eyes and exhaled loudly.

" I just wanted you to be safe from all these assholes. I can't even think about you with any of them without puking. Bella, think about it: It's only gonna be for a few months and... well... it's not real. I can stop touching you full-stop, if you want to. We could tell people we don't want to make a scene in public after what happened today. Nobody's gonna question that. And it's... it's just so much easier. I like you and want you to be safe and I feel like I can only be sure of that if I... you know, mark you as mine."

That did it. I laughed. Edward opened his eyes looking quizzically at me, as I kept on laughing my head off.

"You want to mark me as yours? How are you gonna do that? Are you gonna pee on me, or what?"

That cracked me up even more, so that I was now holding my stomach in laughter. As I looked up to Cullen again I felt relieve rushing through my entire body as I saw him smiling down at me.

"Well... I never thought about that possibility before, but if you say so yourself..." And to my utter surprise he reached for his zipper and started fumbling with it. Reaching out in shock I took his hands in mine in order to stop him, but as I felt his skin connecting with mine the electricity between us made me realize what I had just done and what we'd been talking about before.

I tried to free myself, but Edward didn't let me. Instead he reached for my chin and lifted it up so I was forced to look at him directly.

"Think about it, Bella. It's only gonna be for a year and it's gonna benefit the both of us. We can even make up a fake-relationship-agreement if you want to. You know... write down all the things we can and can't do and stuff. I know you're a sucker for shit like that... and I promise I'm gonna get you a HUGE valentines-day present. And you don't have to get me anything. Like ever again. And another thing... think about all these bitches being jealous of you, because you're going to be the first girl I'll carry the bag for or pick up to and from school and share my lunch with and – "

"Edward" , I said laughing, "You already do these things without us being a couple."

He genuinely smiled at me now and I remember thinking about how his happiness lit up my entire body on fire. I wish he knew... Or no, I don't.

"Well, yes, I know... but it's gonna be different if we're girlfriend and boyfriend. You know... if I do these things now it's because I'm just a nice guy helping out his best friend, but... well... if you're my girlfriend and I help you with your bag or take you to your next lesson or something like that... than it's gonna look like I'm doing it, because I really want you to sleep with me."

With a quick move he yanked me into his arms so his mouth was right next to my ear. My entire body immediately stiffened as I felt him pressed against me. My breath became rigged and my heart kind of forgot how to keep on beating properly. Once in a while it seemed to skip a beat or add some to the usual ones. No way in hell Edward didn't notice that.

Only when he started whispering into my ear – something like "again... and again and again..." - my brain managed to tell my body to fucking keep it together. Pushing against his chest I tried to shove him away, but seriously, this boy is built like a stonewall. Rock solid... urg, sorry, didn't mean to say it like that... (or maybe I kind of did, just a little).

"Come on Edward. If we do this fake-girfriend-boyfriend-thing you gotta have to promise you stop doing things like this. You know I'm not comfortable this close to other people..."

Laughing out loud Edward released me, but only a tiny bit as he then circled his arms around my hips and looked at me, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"So... I guess we're talking "Ifs" now?"

I rolled my eyes. "And we can stop just as easily. Please don't make this a bigger deal than it is. I've listened to your proposal and decided that it is worth a try. And I like the stuff you said about the agreement. The first thing to add to that list is you keeping your hands to yourself if not completely necessary otherwise."

Cullen lifted one eyebrow as I said the last part, looking amused. "Oh... so... what do you mean by necessary? Am I actually allowed to touch the holy temple that is Bella Swan without being accused of a sacrilege?"

Damn, the boy really liked to push my buttons.

"You know it's not very believable for a couple to never touch in public. I think it's alright to... I don't know... act in love if necessary. That means if people ask or... I don't know... we'll know it, if it's needed. Let's just try to avoid such occasions."

"I live to serve you" With that Cullen bowed with me still held in his arms. You can imagine the disaster.

As we landed on the floor – Edward on top of me I might add – laughing our heads off, it was like we were kids again. I remember me and Cullen wrestling in his backyard – back then I was still capable of defeating him by strength – and wondered whether we'd ever be as close again. Maybe this was our chance...

"So..." ,Edward pulled me out of my thoughts, "is that a... yes?"

"I... I guess so... But -" I interrupted before Edward could say anything, "first I really want to talk about the arrangement."

But of course the stupid bell had to ring right at this point, making both of us laugh.

"Looks like we'll have to talk technicalities later." ,Cullen said, got up and then – always the gentleman – helped me up aswell.

By now I felt like my grin would tear my face in half. "Looks like it" ,i agreed and was just about to head back into school when suddenly Jasper appeared in the backdoor.

"Hey man, we were just about to head back inside. No need for a searchparty." ,Cullen joked, suddenly with his arm around me once again and started tugging me forward, but Jasper stopped him.

"I was actually looking for Bella. We have history together now and I wanted to ask her something about the second world war..."

I could literally feel Edwards body shudder. He hated history with a passion one could admire.

"Yeah... well... I guess iIll see you later then, Bells." ,he said, lent down in order to peck my cheek and then he was gone. Just like that... my boyfriend... well fake boyfriend, to be exact, but who cares. A cat is a cat even if it's a white cat...

"Bella?"

Oh, right, Jasper. Second world war. Question. He wanted to ask me... wait.

Something was definitely off here. Jasper never had to ask ME a question about anything history related. I don't know how I didn't find it odd before.

And yes, as I looked at my friend now I found my suspicions confirmed as he looked like he was about to throw up a giant furball.

Suddenly a little nervous I started playing with the hem of my shirt. "What's wrong, Jasper?" ,I eventually asked, afraid of what he might answer.

Because in all these years i've known him by now he's never looked this concerned. And I somehow felt like it might have something to do with me...

"Can we go somewhere private?" ,he answered, his voice dry and emotionless. Now I was really starting to get freaked out!

"But we have class -" ,i tried to argue, but he stopped me.

"I promise I'll tell you everything Mrs. Cole is teaching our class today later on, but erm... I think we really need to talk. Now."

"Why? What's going on? Are you breaking up with me? Because we need to talk really sound like -"

"Just come with me. Please. It's really important."

There was no arguing that. So I just nodded, my heart racing in my chest.

Walking through school wasn't possible as the chances of someone seeing us roaming the corridors aka skipping were too high, so Jasper and I walked around the building in uncomfortable silence. Eventually he lead me towards the parking lot.

"Are we actually going somewhere? Because I erm... you know that my Dad is the chief of police, right? He'll kill me if he sees me in town during school time."

I couldn't actually see his face, but I was sure he wasn't all to happy as he replied: "No, Bella. Don't worry, I just... I just need you to see something for yourself."

Not knowing what to say in return I just kept my mouth shut. Damn, I was nervous. Because even though Jasper and I had known each other for ages we never really hang out just the two of us. Let alone skip school together so he could show me something. So forgive me for saying this, but the shole thing screamed shady in my view...

And suddenly he stopped and turned around. As I followed suit I realized that we had taken a halt right next to Edwards silver Volvo (which I think is a soccer mom car, but that's probably the exact reason why he felt the need to drive it: Made him look even more secure in his masculinity. Idiot.).

Now I was thoroughly confused.

"Okay, I admit I am totally lost. What fuck are we doing here?" ,i asked as Jasper rummaged through one of his pockets. Only a few seconds later he pulled a key out of his jacket, not bothering to answer me before he unlocked the car.

But that didn't keep me from talking. "How the hell did you get that key, Jasper Muriel Whitlock? You know that Edward will skin you alive if he finds out you touched his car unsupervised."

This time Jasper almost smiled... but again, only almost. Opening the door to the passenger seat he looked up at me and suddenly I didn't feel like Edwards freakyness with his precious car would be our biggest problem.

"He knows I have this key. I asked him before you joined us at lunch. But... listen. The reason why I brought you out here is... really important and I don't think you will be happy about what I will show you now so... yeah, just... just think about it"

And with that he moved away and with a move of his hand told me to take a seat in the Volvo. I on the other hand felt like I would be sick any second. Jasper never interfered in anything if not absolutely necessary so this thing he wanted to show me had to be... huge. And unpleasant.

"Open the glove compartment" ,Jasper instructed after I had looked up at him expectantly – and freaked out.

I did as I was told and took a careful look into the compartment as it was open in front of me.

"What am I supposed to look for?" ,i asked eventually. There where about a bazillion things in this thing. How should I know what Jasper was so tense about. Without uttering a word he gestured to a folded piece of paper right in the back, that I hadn't even noticed before.

I pulled it out, my hands shaking even though I didn't want them to. This couldn't be good. And the fact that I was the one here with Jasper assured me that I was somehow involved in this whole scenario. Great. Suddenly I wasn't all too sure whether I really wanted to know what was going on...

"Read it" , Jasper instructed like he had heard my thoughts and again I complied.

Holding my breath I slowly unfolded the paper...

* * *

Aaaaaaand a cliffhanger... sorry guys, but I couldn't help myself. So... any guesses about what's on the paper?

love you people.


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